Pregnancy Sex Tips
Sex is a natural thing for your body to crave (yes, even when you’re pregnant!).
But with your body changing in a million ways, you probably have a million questions about how to do it safely — or whether you should be doing it at all.
Here’s what you need to know about having sex during pregnancy, plus tips for getting it on with your growing belly.
First things first: Is sex during pregnancy safe?
A big concern for many relationships is whether your partner’s penis will touch your uterus during sex — but it won’t. There also isn’t any evidence that having sex during pregnancy will cause a miscarriage, preterm labor or premature birth, either.
In fact, sex is usually considered safe for you and for baby unless your doctor has explicitly asked you to avoid it.
Benefits of having sex during pregnancy
Having sex in general has all kinds of benefits for mama, which in turn benefits your growing babe:
Better physical and mental health
Increased intimacy and bonding between partners
Reduced stress
Lower blood pressure
Tips for safe (and fun) sex during pregnancy
Pregnancy can create a lot of barriers for sex because of fatigue, body aches, not feeling sexy and difficulty with arousal. Plus, being intimate with a big belly can be tricky on its own!
It’s also important to know that your body mechanics and what you are able to do may change during pregnancy, so sex might look a little different than you’re used to.
But sex should be enjoyable for both you and your partner, so it’s important to communicate as much as possible. We’ve provided some suggestions for sex during pregnancy below — just keep in mind that everybody is different, so these might not work for everyone.
Here’s some suggestions to help:
Find your clitoris: The clitoris has a hood. There are muscles that pull back that hood when you get excited or aroused. The more aroused you are, the more likely it is to happen. Also, changing the angle of the pelvis can help expose the clitoris when you have a pregnant belly. If you are on top during sex, get tall in your spine and push your pelvis into an anterior pelvic tilt (arching your back, pressing your pelvis forward). Then drag or scoop the pelvis downward against your partner's pubic bone.
Keep in mind that strong pelvic floors can do a better job of exposing the clitoris. Stay consistent with the Expecting and Empowered Pregnancy App Program and don’t neglect the pelvic floor work.
Try external stimulation: Use your hands. It is important to communicate with your partner about the angle of their hand, the pressure, and the flatness or cupping of their hand.
Explore other positions: Sex doesn’t always have to be penetration! This can be a nice time to explore other ways to be intimate.
Try these positions with an expanding belly:
Spooning
Why it’s great for pregnancy: Comfortable for both partners, low exertion level, keeps pressure off belly and bladder.
Tips: Use your hands (or ask your partner) to rub your clitoris for extra stimulation.
Cowgirl
Why it’s great for pregnancy: Female sets the pace, no pressure on the belly.
Tips: Your legs can be bent forward or straight. Try putting your hands on the headboard or your partner’s chest for stabilization, to save energy and try different angle options. No pillow under male’s head. Could place pillow under partner's butt.
Edge of the bed
Why it’s great for pregnancy: Room for your bump, lots of face-to-face intimacy.
Tips: Place your feet on the floor and your butt on the edge of the bed. Prop yourself up with your elbows or some pillows behind your back. Have your partner either stand or bend over you for penetration.
Standing against the wall or bed
Why it’s great for pregnancy: No pressure on the bladder or uterus, allows for some change of scenery and to mix it up.
Tips: Stand facing the wall or bed, spread your legs apart, and have your hands at shoulder height or above your head.
Doggy style
Why it’s great for pregnancy: More room for your bump and potential for external stimulation.
Tips: Ask your partner to start slowly and have constant communication because of the deep penetration (your cervix is very sensitive during deep penetration!).
QUADRUPED WITh YOGA BALL
Why it’s great for pregnancy: Your belly is supported by the therapy ball.
Tips: Again, ask your partner to start slowly and have constant communication.
Reverse cowgirl (NOT PICTURED)
Why it’s great for pregnancy: No pressure on the belly; hits the G-spot, which creates a different/more intense orgasmic response.
Tips: Have your partner lie down on the bed and straddle him facing his toes. Hold onto his legs or his ankles (this allows for control of penetration, depth, speed, rhythm and angles).
SIDE LYING (NOT PICTURED)
Why it’s great for pregnancy: Low exertion, extra intimacy with face-to-face contact.
Tips: Lie facing your partner, have him move his legs over yours (straight or bent knees). This allows for different variations in speed and depth of penetration.
FLOATING COWGIRL/REVERSE COWGIRL (NOT PICTURED)
Why it’s great for pregnancy: This is done in the bathtub to fight against gravity and put less pressure on mama.
Tips: Straddle your partner either facing him or reverse. Use your hands (or ask your partner) to rub your clitoris for extra stimulation
When Not to Have Sex During Pregnancy
Your doctor may advise you not to have sex if you have any of the following types of high-risk pregnancies:
You're at risk for miscarriage or history of past miscarriages
You're at risk for preterm labor (contractions before 37 weeks of pregnancy)
You're having vaginal bleeding, discharge, or cramping without a known cause
Your amniotic sac is leaking fluid or has ruptured membranes
Your cervix has opened too early in pregnancy
Your placenta is too low in the uterus (placenta previa)
If you’re not sure, always check with your birth provider!
Need more help with painful sex in pregnancy?
References
Brody S. The relative health benefits of different sexual activities. The Journal of Sexual Medicine. 2010;7(4):1336-1361. doi:10.1111/j.1743-6109.2009.01677.x
Charnetski CJ, Brennan FX. Sexual frequency and salivary immunoglobulin A (IGA). Psychological Reports. 2004;94(3):839-844. doi:10.2466/pr0.94.3.839-844
Early pregnancy loss. The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists . https://www.acog.org/womens-health/faqs/early-pregnancy-loss. Published January 2022. Accessed January 12, 2022.
Flynn KE, Lin L, Bruner DW, et al. Sexual satisfaction and the importance of sexual health to quality of life throughout the life course of U.S. adults. The Journal of Sexual Medicine. 2016;13(11):1642-1650. doi:10.1016/j.jsxm.2016.08.011
Frappier J, Toupin I, Levy JJ, Aubertin-Leheudre M, Karelis AD. Energy expenditure during sexual activity in young healthy couples. PLoS ONE. 2013;8(10). doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0079342
Jones C, Chan C, Farine D. Sex in pregnancy. Canadian Medical Association Journal. 2011;183(7):815-818. doi:10.1503/cmaj.091580